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    Tool 20 … A polite but firm tone

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    A summary of ideas for discussion

    • Speak in a polite, firm & friendly tone.
    • Let’s not forget to follow the guidelines for acceptable, respectful behaviour ourselves!

All doors open to courtesy.
‣‣‣ Thomas Fuller

Whether you are reminding children of an agreement or addressing an unacceptable behaviour, don’t forget to follow the guidelines for acceptable, respectful behaviour yourself!!

Underpinning much of toolkit’s approach is the idea of the need for a genuine empathy for the other person in relationship with you. This becomes the main part of motivation to get things just-right in relationship with children … or with anyone for that matter.

Looking for tools for parenting and providing the time and energy for developing them in your own context is also self-help for the parent/teacher. Looking after yourself; making life easier not harder; not being too down on yourself; having a genuine self empathy and self respect will be helpful for everyone.

Step back; take a deep breath; deal with the issues; find the help and the healing; learn to stop repeating the darker moments of our history; what ever it takes to stop being a grump for what ever reason; change something.

Regardless, in the moment, tell yourself, “One of us here needs to be the adult in the situation!” Manage the situation at the very least. Take at least one deep breath. It costs nothing to be polite and respectful to children.

Worth noting?

Be honest now, who catches themselves sounding like their own parent/ past leader in some situations? What are your thoughts/feelings about that?

Further Research:

Seen or heard of or tried anything that works in these moments requiring a polite but firm tone?

Most recent edit: 19FEB15~pd

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